The following are direct quotes from the MTV show "Jersey Shore". Also there will be some of my thoughts at the end.
Pauly D: "I got a fucking tanning bed in my place that's how serious I am about being a guido & living the lifestyle"
Pauly D: "I don't try to take alot of guys girlfriends it just happens. They'll end up leaving them for me"
Nicole (Snooki): "My ultimate dream is to move to Jersey. Find a nice, juiced, hot tanned guy & live my life"
Nicole (Snooki) whilst she is shouting on the street: "I like tanned Italian boys with muscles"
Mike "The Situation": "My abs are so ripped up it's called "The Situation"."
Mike "The Situation":"I check out the mirror & like phew today's gonna be a good day"
Mike "The Situation":"What can you possibly say to someone who looks like Rambo with his shirt off"
Mike "The Situation":"If I walked in the door & saw myself. I'd probably grab my girl real quick"
Sammi (Sweetheart):"I'm not looking for Mr.Right. I am looking to break alot of hearts & get with alot of good, hot, sexy guido's"
Sammi (Sweetheart): "If your not a guido, you can get the fuck out my face"
Ronnie: "Just take your shirt off & they come to you. The fly comes to shit" - (Well he's right about the shit part)
Angelina: "I am the Kim Kardashian of Staten Island, baby"
Mike "The Situation":"Cause once I arrive, It's like I'm here & everybody's gonna be like oh shoot that's "The Situation" right there. Yes sir it is"
Mike "The Situation": "I see this beautiful girl & I'm like damn. And I immediately was like alright. I figured I'd hook up with her"
Ronnie: "Let's get filthy, creepy & weird"
Vinny: "Sammi's not the hottest girl. I'd definitely expect a little bit hotter."
Ronnie: "Like when I bring girls back here, she might melt in here pants"
Pauly D on work: "I hope it's not hard work cause I don't even wanna work. I'm a fucking DJ"
Angelina on Nicole (Snooki) in the jacuzzi "How do you go in a fuckin jacuzzi with them in a bra.Wear a thong bikini,thats a little bit more classier.If youre gonna wear anythin at all"
Vinny: "Jwwow you didn't mention you had a boyfriend all night. What a shady bitch"
Pauly D on Jwwow's (Jenni) boyfriend issue: "You kidding me. You got hot guys in this house. I'll help you forget about your boyfriend"
Pauly D: "Girls are supposed to cook & guys are supposed to eat. That's how it is"
Mike "The Situation": "I mean this situation is gonna be indescribable. You cant even describe the situation that you're about to get into the situation"
Mike "The Situation" on the women of the Jersey Shore: "I could have my choice of pretty much anyone down here"
Mike "The Situation" on his chances with Sammi (Sweetheart): "We can vibe enough & I can cut that out"
Angelina on selling t-shirts: "I feel like this job is beneath me. I'm a bartender, I do great things"
Angelina working at the t-shirt selling shop: "Maybe the hours are too much for me. 8 or 9 hours a day"
Ronnie on Sammi (Sweetheart): "I'd pound out Sam"
Mike "The Situation" on who loves him: "Everybody loves me. Babies, dogs, you know hot girls, cougars"
Nicole (Snooki): "My ideal man would be Italian, dark, muscle, guido, juice head"
Mike "The Situation" on Sammi (Sweetheart): "It's not a matter of if she wants to hook up with me, it's a matter of when I decide"
Nicole's (Snooki) man friend after Mike says they look cute together: "Your boy Mike's on the right page"
Pauly D on potential "hook up" with Jwoww (Jenni): "The party's in Pauly D's pants tonight"
Jwoww (Jenni) on seeing Pauly D's penis: "I just saw your penis"
Nicole (Snooki): "Me & my friend Robbie wanted to watch the sunset no the sunrise"
Mike "The Situation": "The situation just never fails"
Pauly D on a potential fight in a club: "The Situation's like I think we have a situation"
Mike "The Situation": "As far as I know everybody loves the situation & if you don't love the situation, I'm gonna make you love the situation"
Angelina: "I'm a cock block"
My thoughts on the show & the people:-
There's alot of fucking swearing in this show.
Oh no. The one I thought was cute has a really annoying voice.
I have watched 1 minute & 51 seconds. I have already had 4 tremendous quotes. I can feel more are coming.
It took me about 3 hours to watch a show which lasts 1 hour & 21 minutes.
Thought on Nicole (Snooki): I HATE YOU! You tiny over tanned douchbag loving floosie.
Thought on Nicole (Snooki): EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW unclean unclean.
My 2 favourites are Vinny & Angelina. Pauly D needs a punch. Ronnie needs to get off the roids. Jwoww needs to pop those ballons.
Mike "The Situation" is the ultimate douchebag. Sammi is good looking but forgettable & the annoying orange ugly tiny one, ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.
